she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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