I've blown a few things in my day
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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