I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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