I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
