i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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