So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
