i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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