i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
