woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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