how can u be prego again
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
