Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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