Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
