Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
