Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
