He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize