I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
