I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize