Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
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