i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
