I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
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I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
It's official drugs can't kill me
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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