: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
