I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
