we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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