You're so nebulous sometimes
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
