my vag is so smooth its legendary
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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