too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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