Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
