I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
