Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
