Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
