i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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