I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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