Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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