just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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