ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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