loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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