ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
The power of my boobs compel you
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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