Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
