Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
