All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize