i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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