no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize