Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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