I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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