That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
