they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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