She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
