it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize