Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
