No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
