DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
